You are responsible for your success - no one else is.

The moment you take responsibility for everything in your life is the moment you gain the power to change anything in your life. 

To clarify, no, you are not responsible for crimes committed against you if you have been the victim of a crime or abuses.  That is something else entirely.  However, you are responsible for your actions, behaviors, failures, successes and attitudes following anything that has occurred to you.

"I'm unhappy because my mom used to beat me as a kid."

"I'm overweight because I was molested."

"I can't exercise because my husband won't let me take a break from the kids."

Those thoughts are what must change.

As long as we use our past hurts and other people as reasons for our failings or unhappiness, we will never change our behaviors.

If any of these things sound like you, then it is you I am speaking to: It's my husband's fault I am unhappy.  It's my kids' fault I'm unable to exercise.  I gained weight because of my children. I had feelings of insecurity because of a childhood wound... etc..

Those are attitudes we CAN change. 

The moment you accept the responsibility that your success and happiness is up to YOU and no one else, is the moment that change can begin to happen in your life.

Here's how it works...

I've heard many women over the years say they can't exercise because of  their kids. And yet, I've seen women pushing jogging strollers in races!  I danced with my babies in the living room or have done push-ups to kiss my babies faces, or weighted squats holding a child in my arms.  Many gyms and fitness studios offer child care and sometimes for free or free with trade for babysitting services.  Including my favorite little Studio in Hurricane Utah- Phazes Studio.

BUT, it's not MY job or anyone else's to find your solutions for what to do with your kids so you can get the exercise YOU need.

What about your happiness?  Do you blame your unhappiness on someone else? Can you become happy in the situation you are currently in? Or do you need to change your situation?  When you find out that you CAN change anything and develop the inner strength to do so, it is an amazing self-discovery.  Developing inner strength is the same as creating outer or physical strength, it is something that starts weak and can be exercised to increase in your ability to do the things you need to do for your own happiness, success and health regardless of your living circumstances or past hurts.  

One of my favorite daily affirmations I read every single morning is this "The moment I take responsibility for everything in my life is the moment I gain the power to change anything in my life!"

And I am.  And I feel powerful.

I feel powerful when I decide to make changes regardless of life circumstances.  Life is busy.  My family is demanding.  I have a crazy schedule with my 2 businesses.  All those things could get in the way of me reaching my physical goals or taking time doing what matters most.  Today my husband and I went to a 30 minute HIIT class together. Usually we don't do that.  But today I asked for what I wanted.  I wanted to spend time with him.  I want to be healthy. And I needed a quick workout that pushed my limits.  Asking my husband to join me because I love him and want to spend time with him is just one way of being assertive in asking for what you need. 

Don't use excuses anymore.  Make choices and take responsibility for everything in your life.  What choices will you make today?

Try looking at life through the eyes of a person that takes responsibility for everything and see what changes you can make.

 - Michelle

Glady's has still got it!

Friday - Family relationship health is our focus today...

Last night my family enjoyed a Glady's Knight concert together.  We took my Mother-in-Law and my kids (except my oldest that had work conflict - sad story).

When we told our kids we were going to this event, they said "Who?"

WHAT??  WHAT?? You mean, you don't know who this is???

So we began an education into the background of R&B and Soul music in America and forced them to watch every Youtube video we could find with Glady's Knight and the Pips.

But it didn't do the live performance justice.  DUDE, That lady has still got it at age 73!
Yes girl!

She was sexy and vibrant and could belt it out!  Plus funny and witty and so much fun to listen to her stories.

Glady's began rattling off her musical mentors from her early years in, those that helped her and taught her the ropes of showmanship and the entertainment industry.  Just a few of the names  I remember her mentioning: Sammy Davis Jr.,  Frank Sinatra, BB King, etc... etc...  The list went on and on of amazing musicians in a time my kids don't even know.  I was in awe of the pieces of American music History this woman was carrying with her.

My favorite highlight of the night was seeing the look on my 18 year old son's face at his first concert when the music came on, the energy was high and she started to sing it loud and proud.  My kid squealed like a teenage girl just met her teen idol.  It was adorable!  But it was a Teenage Boy watching a powerful 70+ year old woman that is now a great grandmother and still rocked that stage like the star she has always been.  Krazy Kool.

Then there was the romantic songs.  I loved being next to the love of my life and holding each other through songs like "Your the best thing that's ever happened to me." and "Neither one of us, wants to be the first to say goodbye."

   Such amazing times last night.  Such great memories.  It was the first concert of it's kind that we have taken our kids to.    And I am going to put this out there... I want more.

Connection doing things together that build relationships.  That's what today's focus is in this blog.  Our family has been super strict on where we choose to spend our money.  Concerts for a family our size is not a thing that we choose to spend our money on.  We like food.

Last night for us, it was a concert from a music legend.  But family connections can happen anywhere, doing anything.  If  you still have kids at home, let them be a part of the decision making process of how to spend time together.  Or at least throw out a few suggestions and let them choose between a few choices you approve of.

You could do anything really.  Free stuff, like hiking or making a picnic to take to the park.  or even sitting next to your teenage son and playing that stupid video game alongside him.  Tell him you will play that game with him today, if he goes to Yoga with you tomorrow.  I don't know, maybe not.  Teach your family that time together is valuable.  I have decided that QUALITY  concerts are now a thing I will make sure we invest in.  I had way too much fun not to do that again with our kids.

Tomorrow my kids and I are going to go volunteer at a race aid station.  We love doing that kind of thing.  They get to be inspired by amazing athletes and give back with their time and service.  Plus, it's another free way to get out of the house, do something fun and meaningful together and enjoy an active lifestyle, even if they are not running the race.  The truth is, every time we do one of those aid stations, I have a kid that says they want to run a race.  So, it's a win-win-win situation for all of us.

No kids at home?  Contact a family member.  If they live close, meet up and do something.  If not, at least a phone call or better yet, video chat and connect face to face. 

Today your challenge is to find one way to build those family relationships.

Let's chat about your pillars...

Are you aware of the pillars of health?  It's a concept I was introduced to over 20 years ago by some Japanese business men at a so-called "Sales training" meeting.  The company was Nikken Inc.  The training was their beginner level training called "Silver Training".  It was for their sales team, but I went because I wanted to have some self improvement.  I wasn't a Representative of the company  but, my dad, Larry Proffit, was the VP of Sales and Marketing and the was main Speaker and lead trainer for Nikken at the time, SO I got a free pass in.  Lucky me!

    The company is based in Japan.  They brought a weird way of thinking about business over here to us Americans.  It was interesting to note that at that "sales team meeting" not one word of sales skills or how to improve your business by increasing sales, was brought up.  We didn't even learn about their products that they sell at all!  It was purely Self-Care and self improvement.  They were big on creating a Life-Cycle plan or a HUGE vision board that mapped out 10 years of dreaming in Several areas of health.  They called this the "5 Pillars of Health".

The concept that you cannot be an effective sales representative for the company if you are not balanced in these areas of life, was the training for the weekend.  It was very revealing.  I did do my vision board/Life-cycle plan.  And I do have to say, most of that stuff I put on the vision board has happened.  It works.

Since that training, I have gone on and researched "pillars of health" and have discovered, there are a LOT of philosophies of what those Pillars of health actually are:

There are dozens more philosphies about Pillars of health out there.  Some get super complex.  I decided that my business needs to be simple and based around the basics.  I don't need my  life complicated anymore than it already is.
As I was setting Goals with my kids, I asked them what they want in some basic areas of life and challenged them to set goals in those "pillar" categories.
I changed them around a bit and made it 7.  You can create your own categories if you want or take it and adjust all of the above ones as you see fit.

Here are the categories I decided were important for balanced life, health and success:
1 - Spiritual
2 - Physical
3 - Work/ finances
4 - Emotional
5 - Intellectual
6 - Social (friends/community)
7 -  Family relationships

I might be a "fitness Professional", but what I have discovered is that when someone is out of whack in one of those areas of health, they have a difficult time reaching their fitness goals. As a personal trainer I found I was dealing with people that had loads of "baggage" and garbage built up in other areas of their life and until they released it or dealt with it, they struggled to feel good, drop weight or develop healthy eating habits.  It's my belief that true physical fitness/health is a result of feeling amazing about who you are and what you are capable of.  This comes as a result of repaired relationships with God, family, community, wealth, emotional well-being and  your relationship to money too.  It's all connected.  I guess the relationship can be flipped and you could say that your financial well-being could be the result of balance in the other areas, and so forth.  Your health in each pillar category is increased and becomes better as the other pillar categories come into balance.
  I left the business of Personal training because I was tired of helping people get the perfect butt when they were just unhappy with their marriage.  The perfect butt and waistline wasn't going to fix it.  I was tired of dealing with unhealthy people with unrealistic physical expectations that really needed a more well-rounded approach to true wellness.    I no longer consider myself a personal trainer per se.  I am a wellness professional today.  I focus on whole wellness over physical perfection.

   As you read this blog and follow me, you will see me focus on addressing the "pillars of health".  Each day, I am striving to focus on just one area of my life to improve. In a perfect world, all 7 would be addressed daily and worked on.  But baby steps is a great place to start.  So, each day, I challenge you to look at just one area of your life and improve in that place for that day.

Sunday - SPIRITUAL  - How is your relationship with God?  Do you take the time to pray, meditate and listen to his desires for your life?  It is my belief that we have a supreme being that cares about our well-being who reaches out to us.  It is up to us to listen.  You may have a religious affiliation or not.  I believe all of us are children of God.  Have you taken the time today to build on that important relationship?  It is up to us to listen quietly and reflect on the love he has for each of us.  I know that as I have done this, I have found inspiration for my life and the path I need to take in all other areas of health.

Monday - PHYSICAL - I do believe in movement daily as well as balanced nutrition all week.  Not just once a week.  But Mondays are a great day to start again with planning your meals and workouts.  A strong, healthy body helps boost your immune system and rid yourself of the blues.  Move and re-commit to your fitness and nutrition plan every Monday.

Tuesday - WORK/ FINANCES - Take this day to look at your career and financial goals. Are you going the right direction?  Are you saving money?  Is your business healthy?  What adjustments need to be made today or what action plans need to happen to bring you closer to your dreams?

Wednesday - EMOTIONAL - Do you think before you react?  How are you managing stress?  This is a good day to be a little more aware about your emotional responses to people and situations.  What do you do when someone cuts you off in traffic?  Or that crazy coupon-er that takes too long at the grocery store in line in front of you?  How is your emotional well-being?

Thursday - INTELLECTUAL - Do you take the opportunity to learn something new?  Are you reading any books? Taking an on-line course?  What are you doing to ignite that amazing brain of yours? Your education should always be a priority.  Have you taken time to learn from masters in the field of your interests and hobbies?  Or how about learning something new that you have never tried before?  How will you ignite your mind today?

Friday - SOCIAL  - How is your relationship with your community? Your friends?  This might be a good day to connect to an old friend or find opportunities to serve the community. I have heard people say, "I don't have any friends".  So what about reaching out to others that also feel lonely?  Quit sitting in front of the screen.  Turn off the electronics for a bit and connect face to face with other people.  How is your social health?  Take this day and find one way to improve in that area.

Saturday - FAMILY - When was the last time your talked to your mom or dad? Brother?  or Aunt or Uncle? What about other family member you have been out of touch with.  Would it be weird to pick up the phone and reach out over the miles to say "I miss you and I love you.  Remember when....?"  Take today and reach out and touch someone.  Was that AT&T's slogan back in the 80's?  This is also a great day to take the kids on a hike or a date with your spouse.

That's it.
Those are MY pillars of health I will be focusing on as we work together to build a happy, healthy  life.  I guarantee that as we work on these pillars of health, you will see increase in fitness results, joy, and peace.  This is the secret formula.  I am telling you!


Are you ready for true bliss?  I know I am.

 - Blessings,
       Michelle

Crazy negative responses to Oprah today...

This image of sheep will make sense if you keep reading.  Because right now, it seems rather silly.
Here are my thoughts today.  I was sitting here enjoying Oprah Winfrey interview Tracey Morgan on her series "Super Soul Sunday:"  I was enjoying Tracey discussing his life experiences and how being in a car accident changed him and his perception on life. I was touched.

I made the mistake of reading other people's comments.
I should have known better.  UGH!  While most people were uplifted and were commenting about the great story and inspiration they were receiving, there were those few... those very few...  who were idiots.  Yes, I am using the word idiots.  I am probably wrong.  I am sure those negative individuals probably just have a different life experience and have no idea what they are saying is so ridiculously wrong.  Let me let you peak into their comments:

"Oprah should interview real people not rich folks who we real people can't relate to."

"Tracey Morgan is just a rich actor, He's not relatable."

"We need to hear from real people."

Etc...

I am sure Oprah or any person who has thousands of viewers is used to the negativity that comes with putting yourself out there for others.  It comes with the territory, I know,  I know.

ANYWAY....
What  I learned from those folks making the negative comments was that if you have a profession that you worked hard at, like Tracey had (apparently those people missed that part of the interview), once you get rich and famous you are no longer human and have nothing to offer the rest of the world of average people still "slumming it".

Uhhhh.....

I'm confused.
OK folks.  Here's the deal, you can choose to learn anything from anyone anywhere of any background, color, social-economic status, gender, nationality,.... uhhhhhh.....

what else?

YOU decide if you can learn or you can shut your mind down because YOU decide if you are unteachable.

Tracey Morgan and I are very different people.  He is a black man, comedian, with a youth history of drugs and alcohol.  I am not.  He's got a lot more money than me and has been divorced.

I am a white woman, Mormon, never touched a drop of alcohol or drugs in my life, only been married once, can't even stand most of Tracey Morgan's comedy, Living in Utah, still rising out of financially rough times.  my life is VERY different from Tracey's.  But I found myself riveted to his story of triumph.  I loved his testimony of God's role in his life.  I found myself learning and growing from what he had to share with the world.

Did you know the thing he is most grateful for in life is... LIFE everyday?

It's a beautiful sentiment.

As I was listening to him and loving what I was gaining, I was reading a few comments about how he was unrelatable.  And yet, there I was finding him very relatable to me.  A white, conservative female in Utah living a lower class lifestyle was finding a Black comedian living an upper-class life after rising out of Drug use and alcohol and a broken marriage....  I found him relatable.  I was learning while a few other closed their minds because they chose not to see the similarities or they chose not to learn because apparently they believe you can only learn from someone who is in your exact shoes.  It's a sad state of mind.

That brings me to the picture of the sheep above.

I am blessed with a very wise mother.  I grew up on a ranch in Wyoming.  My uncle and grandpa raised sheep and cattle.  As we drove down our 2 mile dirt road, we were often stopped by a herd of sheep crossing the road in front of us.  I remember the time my mom took the opportunity to find all the life lessons she could think of while watching the sheep cross in front of us.  "sheep and teenagers are a lot alike...."  she went on with her analogy which I don't really remember.

My mom took opportunities often to teach us metaphors for life from the animals on the ranch or anything she saw in front of her.  I learned from my mom that you can learn any life lesson wherever you choose to look for one.  If I can learn about life from a herd of sheep, surely I can also learn from a man who rose out of rough situations to stardom!  Right?   We look different, we think different, We are very different.  But he has something to offer and I can choose to see it or reject it.

Maybe those negative comments on Oprah video were made by people who have never learned this amazing skill of learning from anywhere. 

I choose to learn.  I learn from everyone I meet.  Life is better when you see everyone as having something valuable to offer the world.

Take that challenge and try it out.  See if things seem better and brighter and more awesome.